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Essays, Stories, Adventures, Dreams
Chronicles of a Footloose Forester
By Dick Pellek

The US Postal Service Has a Few Problems

This is not a normal Chronicles of a Footloose Forester posting, but readers will get the point. It may get filed under the Humor category of chronicles.  Nonetheless, if the purposes of communications are to: Inform : Instruct : Entertain, then it may entertain you first, while informing you about a few recent and continuing problems that Footloose Forester has with the US Postal Service. 

First of all, despite repeated attempts to correct the spelling of his official address through various sources, Footloose Forester wants you to know that he does not live in Greenbackvile, Virginia.  Dozens and dozens of advertisers, creditors, NGOs, and even governmental agencies use that incorrect address. And they didn't get it from the Footloose Forester. He has been at his current address for about 15 years and for 15 years the same problem has persisted.

Within the last 14 days, the Footloose Forester received two letters from official sources that used an incorrect address.  One was from the Social Security Administration, and was addressed to him in Greenbackvile, Virginia.  Where they got that incorrect information is anybody's guess.  The second item was a Certified Letter from his local Home Owners Association, advising him of an upcoming hearing.  The HOA has headquarters in Greenbackville, but the addressee who lives about a half-mile away, received the important notice addressed to him at a place called Greenbackvile, according to the typed address which showed through a cellophane window in the envelope.  According to the Postmaster with whom he spoke, Footloose Forester is not obliged to open the letter if the address is incorrect.    

The current problem is with the USPS Tracking Report relating to a package he sent on 29 October 2025. Maybe he will point out the problem in an updated chronicle, but for the moment, Footloose Forester is inviting your input--as part of a real game.  But the first problem began with a notice from the USPS saying that the delivery address was incorrect or unknown.  Fat chance!  The full USPS Tracking Report is copied and pasted below.  Do you see the problem?

USPS tracking

Sunday, November 23, 2025

7:11 AM

Latest Update

Your package will arrive later than expected, but is still on its way. It is currently in transit to the next facility.

Moving Through Network

In Transit to Next Facility, Arriving Late

November 14, 2025

Arrived at USPS Regional Origin Facility

RICHMOND VA DISTRIBUTION CENTER 

November 10, 2025, 12:39 am

Arrived at USPS Regional Facility

NORFOLK VA DISTRIBUTION CENTER 

November 6, 2025, 1:46 am

Departed USPS Regional Facility

RICHMOND VA DISTRIBUTION CENTER 

November 5, 2025, 11:25 pm

Arrived at USPS Regional Origin Facility

RICHMOND VA DISTRIBUTION CENTER 

November 5, 2025, 9:02 pm

Arrived at USPS Regional Facility

NORFOLK VA DISTRIBUTION CENTER 

October 31, 2025, 5:10 pm

Arrived at USPS Regional Origin Facility

RICHMOND VA DISTRIBUTION CENTER 

October 31, 2025, 10:46 am

Arrived at Post Office

NEW CHURCH, VA 23415 

October 29, 2025, 9:41 am

Arrived at USPS Regional Origin Facility

NORFOLK VA DISTRIBUTION CENTER 

October 28, 2025, 3:09 am

Arrived at USPS Regional Origin Facility

RICHMOND VA DISTRIBUTION CENTER 

October 27, 2025, 11:47 pm

After a couple of months with no resolution of the delayed delivery, a local agent of the USPS telephoned the Footloose Forester and advised him to file a claim for a lost package.  All the precise and chronological tracking reports notwithstanding, the USPS tracking apparently did not use the option to send the package back to the sender.  For the record, the return address, hand printed in ink, was on the package.  Just so you know, there are weaknesses in the tracking system that an eyes-on and hands-on approach by a human might have mitigated.