Last  night, my husband handed me an envelope that contained a letter I had written to him at Christmas 1995.  I was so touched that he had saved it all these years, that I thought I would share it with all of you.

My dearest one,

We have spent forty eight Christmases together. Some were bountiful and some were lean. I remember one particular Christmas when we lived on Greeley Court in the early years of our marriage. I wanted a wrist watch so badly as I had never had one. The television was advertising Hamilton watches every few minutws and I foolishly thought that you would be able to get me one.

Christmas morning came and I anxiously waited while the kids opened their presents. My watch was sure to come! After the kids with their shining eyes opened their presents you handed me a gift box the size that would contain a watch. I was ecstatic when you said, " Here is your Hamilton watch". With great excitement I opened the box and there inside was an imitation watch. There wasn't even any hands on it that moved. I was crushed and hurt. I was too young to know that watch was a gift of true love. You were telling me that it was the closest thing to what you would have liked to give me.

You knew what little we had needed to be given to our kids.

There were times when I thought we wouldn't have any money for Christmas presents for the kids. You would go to the top of the cabinets or other hiding places and pull down forty or fifty dollars you had somehow managed to keep aside.

You have always made sacrifices for me and the kids. Everyone in our family knows this.You always made sure there were plenty of presents under the tree on Christmas morning no matter how broke we were. You wanted our kids to know that even though we had such a large family, Santa would never pass by our house without stopping.

But this isn't just about Christmas. From the times on Greely Court when there were only five kids to Rockland St and Lincoln Ext. when there were ten, your kids have always remembered how you came home after a hard day's work with a lunch pail filled with candy or other surprises. Nor will they ever forget that every night after supper you were never too tired to go out in the back yard to hit the baseball out to the seven boys so they would play better at their school games.

You are still carrying on the tradition today of bringing candy to your granchildren. They won't forget what their loving Papa does for them. It's the little things that are so important to them.

My name doesn't belong beside yours on these little gifts of love.  I'm sorry it's on them today. It won't happen again.This is yours and yours alone. This is why I love you so much.

When we were first married, how many times did I ask why you rarely told me that you loved me and you would say,"Words don't mean anything". A lesson I had to learn. You stayed up with me half the night helping me to feed the twins then going to work early the next morning to carry that heavy hod all day. Sending me to visit my mother and when I came home you had all the floors washed and waxed. There are too many things to mention . I could go on and on. The only excuse I had in those days was not knowing the True meaning of love.

You can't do as much as you used to but the love and respect you've always had and still do for me is something I know you have passed down to our kids. I appreciate that so very much. They are so fortunate to have a Dad and a Papa like you.

I hope when the Good Lord calls us that I will go first, for I can't think of a world without you in it.

I wanted all of your kids and grandkids to hear this message. There's so much about you that they will never know.

So my darling , this is my Christmas message to you.

Do you remember our song,  "I'll be loving you always"? We felt it was written for us.  It Was!

Merry Christmas Honey