This probably falls under my common theme of TMI (Too much information) but it is what it is..

When I was 20, one work night my best friend Troy spent the night at my apartment.  We were both getting ready in the morning and I was showering and he was making breakfast; Fried eggs and toast.  Unbeknownst to be, Troy had just set the plate of piping hot eggs on my bed. So I sashayed out of the bathroom in my towel and promptly sat on my bed to put on my pantyhose and sat on the plate. All the sudden I felt this pain and stood up and saw the egg plastered to my butt and boiling hot egg-magma running down!  I hollered out and Troy asked "Are you ok?"  I said I just totally burned my butt on the egg!  He said how the hell did you do that?"  We laughed and laughed.  I had to put some salve on it and keep getting ready for work. I was amazed at how bad the burn was.  I literally could not sit on one side of my butt ALL day.  I worked as a receptionist - greeting people all day. So there I sat cockeyed all day and all the employees are asking, what's wrong with you?  I was not about to say; “ Oh, I burned my butt on a fried egg”. 

I could only imagine the ways people might have thought that could happen!  So, I just said.. Oh, I hurt myself. I’ll be fine.  In a momentary lapse of judgment, I told my sister Sheri, who also worked at this company as a receptionist at the other side of the building.

I eventually felt better in a day or two and all was fine until...  about a year later on my 21st birthday my sweet sister arranged to have a "Chippendales singing telegram" come to my work for my 21st Birthday to sing.  So there I am in the lobby full of 35+ people sitting on his lap being sung to, which is embarrassing enough, but after he finished, he asks out LOUD “So, I really just have one question?  How in the world did you burn your butt on a fried egg?” Oh yes, the story travelled to the other 300 employees quickly and it took about 6 months to die down at work.  Sheri, I'll get you my pretty!   

Here I am sitting on his lap - across a room full of people. And yes, the sign does say.. KISS the Birhday Person :) Good times.